Being Married: The Issue Vs. The Person

Being Married: The Issue vs. The Person

When couples conflict, many variables come into play, personality, emotion, past experiences, etc. and these variables could send the conflict on a totally different level, if not well dealt with.

One huge variable in Conflict resolution is Separating The Person from the Issue – meaning, instead of attacking the person directly, find the WHY and try solving that.

A spouse with low Self-Esteem would always feel inferior. A spouse with Pride would do a lot of damage (especially financially). A woman with no emotional fulfillment would always have headache when her husband touches her. A man who feel nagged at home would look for (or find) an excuse to come home late. A spouse who goes to church with you but is spiritually dead will still produce fruit of the Flesh.

So, instead of attacking your spouse – find out the WHY of why he or she is doing what they do (you’ll be amazed at sometimes how deep and long-rooted the issue is) even though they don’t like it themselves.

Some of us might have to deal with some subconscious nurturing issues that we take out on our spouse and children? I understand prayer and deliverance, but in this case i’m talking about unlearning learned behaviors (change of perspective). By the way you are not too old to change if you really want to.